


Puppets' cries

by Luminee



Category: K-pop, Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Dystopia, Alternate Universe - Post-Apocalypse, Background Relationships, Homophobia Does Not Exist, HyungWonho - Freeform, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Showki, There Is Only One Bed, Two gays being dudes while the world is burning, WILL END WELL no matter what, be gay do crimes, burn the government, debates over how useful art really is, grey morality, jooheon does illegal shit but it's for the art, theater actor jooheon, trying to find their place in a fucked up world
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-11
Updated: 2020-07-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:28:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23599855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luminee/pseuds/Luminee
Summary: « The fall of a civilisation is not an event but a chain of one time disasters on a canvas of progressive changes just as disruptive. »The world in which Minhyuk grew up had changed. Nature slowly takes its rights back and, as humanity struggle, art is dying. When he meets Jooheon, a book thief, he sees a new ray of hope."Don't you think there's something else? Something more than just surviving?"*« Parfois dans le fond d’une cave, parfois devant dix mille personnes hurlantes sous un ciel étoilé, le théâtre a toujours existé, même au commencement quand ils ne possédaient pas le langage, le besoin de transmettre, de communiquer était le plus fort. »
Relationships: Chae Hyungwon/Lee Hoseok | Wonho, Lee Jooheon/Lee Minhyuk, Son Hyunwoo | Shownu/Yoo Kihyun
Comments: 17
Kudos: 19





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Hello !  
> How do I start this note? This will probably be a bit long but necessary so I hope you don't mind too much  
> First of all this fic is kinda a huge project of mine that I really really had in my mind for a while now (like 5 years?) and i'm so emotional about finally writing it! I'm writing in french and then I have to translate it so that takes a bit of time so please bear with me if there is any long pause during updates, I'm also kinda trying to see if anyone is really interested by that haha so plz plz comment if you like it it'll be so much motivation!
> 
> Quick disclaimer, I had to switch Minhyuk and Jooheon's age, so Minhyuk here is the youngest, and yes i'm also annoyed at myself but they both fitted (I think) the characters I gave them so I made this sacrifice haha  
> I think there is some french references I hope it won't be too much of a problem to not understand / get it, but you can always ask me for explanations; I created this whole dystopian universe based on french society obviously, it's the one I live in and so I can analyze it to create the most believable universe.  
> Also, yeah I'm a theater student I think you will easily understand it as the story goes on :D  
> I did not re-read this gosh I hope my english is okay i'm in a constant struggle with both my language 
> 
> You can find me on twitter if you want to, we can discuss or whatever it's @woobrioche !  
> (the quotes on the summary: 1) comes from a french book called "Une autre fin du monde est possible" and i just translated 2) is taken from a french play called 2500 à l'heure written by Jacques Livchine, kept it in french for aesthetics purposes ngl)
> 
> HUGE thanks to [Aguamenting](https://archiveofourown.org/users/aguamenting) for the summary bc i suck so much at this, [etoilephilante](https://archiveofourown.org/users/etoilephilante/pseuds/etoilephilante) and [Maluucious](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maluucious) for beta-reading in french

The end of the world like Minhyuk had known it had not been a brutal one thing moment. It had been a series of disasters, of changes and upheavals. And Minhyuk had felt like he was looking at those like he had been in front of a movie. A movie from which he only understood tiny bits, and from which his parents desperately tried to turn down the volume when he was near because he had been too young at that time. But not even children had been spared from this progressive decline. He had seen without being able to explain it humanity slowly dying, taken by spasm of realization, convulsions of optimism, desperately looking for fresh air to breathe. However he had also seen it suffocating over this polluted air due to carbon and tear gas. Humanity had tried to fight until the very last second, taken by an as vain as heroic hope. What they had not realized was that no home could beat the terrible machine of time that waited for no one. Minhyuk vaguely remembered endless and violent storms that had lead to pouring rain and had blocked roads, schools, offices. He recalled the weeks of isolation that quickly turned into months and had stopped his education, the shops empty due to the global panic and the lack of resupplying to feed the entire town. He was not able to see the difference between his memories and his nightmares in which all he could heard were screams. Screams of revolt first, then of fear and anger. But he could see clearly the worried whispers his parents would share between them after midnight, his parents turning off the television when they were catching him eavesdropping. His mother taking him inside her arms, kissing tenderly his forehead to quieten the questions that were going out of his mouth. Often, Minhyuk was wondering if he had been good for him to hear the answers of those questions.

The world had ended oddly. In a few month only, laws had been changed, the emergency and panic had taken over everything else. In a very short laps of time, society had been shaken up, surprised by the countdown that had been started years ago but from which everyone had closed their eyes. Minhyuk had understood later the rage that his mother had let explode without even trying to hide it from her little boy, the fear that he had himself felt in the bottom of his stomach. Life like they had known it had disappeared overnight and their freedom had faded away.

*

Jooheon was walking fast in the streets of the capital city, sneaking as discreetly as a cat, avoiding what was left of the big roads of it, choosing the invisibility that was offered with the short cuts. It was soon ten pm and in a few minutes, it would be forbidden for him to freely wander around outside. The curfew had been shortened even more and any kind of law breaking could cost a lot. The going out after a decided hour ban allowed to handle the city better, or it was what the state leaders were saying. The young man had been able to hear, the day before, the speech of one of the government’s puppet explaining how important the curfew was to handle the citizens consumerism. Jooheon went even faster, holding very tightly his tiny backpack. Only a few meters before reaching his house. The streets were empty. Rare were those who would, like he was doing, play with the law’s limits. The only souls he passed by were cops that all gave him dark looks. He kept his head down, sagging his body as much as possible while holding the quick pace. In his backpack, Jooheon was carrying a few theater plays that he had been able to find after breaking into one of the many libraries the state had closed. _Antigone_ , _Hamlet_ , _L’Eden Cinéma_. He was already existed to show the treasures he had found but if he was being arrested, he knew very well he was risking death.

Putting back the death penalty had been easier than what Jooheon had thought at that time. The question had been quickly put on the table when the new government had started to discuss about the overpopulation. Between controlling the newborns and sentencing to death criminals, everyone had seen more justice in the latter one. Jooheon hold an unfunny laugh. A few years after this, another law had been passed to limit the number of children by couple. As time went by, people sentenced to death became more diverse; there was first the big jails cleaning, those who had been condemned for life had immediately seen their sentence changed to death. Then law became more flexible, from murders they sentenced burglars of any sort and new crimes appeared, all of them with the same deadly sentence. Stealing when each and every citizen had to be rationed was quickly seen as the worst crime, especially in case of food stealing. Not following the curfew, disobeying to the police, having more than one kid, the list that would lead one to gallows kept on growing every day. And then, eventually, not being seen as useful enough to the society and not showing the effort to be so, not dedicating one’s life to the greater good of the society, started to be reprehensible. That moment had been the death of culture and entertainment. Cinemas closed, art galleries and any kind of cultural manifestation stopped, the number of tv channels dropped, radios disappeared, theaters shut down.

An alarm rang. An unpleasant and strident sound that Jooheon hated until he got used to it. Ten pm. The sound signal meant that anyone found in the street from now on could be arrested by the police. Jooheon started to run. Only a few meters left. He put his hand on his building door right when he heard muffled step sounds coming closer to him. The young man quickly turned the keys, unlocking the door and entered into the hall. He did not wait for home to go into his own little apartment, in which he had been living ever since he had left high school, closing it carefully behind him. He took finally the time to catch his breath, his back on the door. When he felt calm, he turned on the lights and put down his backpack. In a reflex, he looked through the window, giving him a view of the road he had just crossed. Few cops were now patrolling there. He pulled the curtains angrily.

Jooheon shut with difficulty the rage that was growing in his guts, the unpleasant feeling that was tightening the upper part of his body and that was giving him an irrational need of screaming. The taste of injustice was going up from his throat to his mouth. Those feelings, he was now used to see them burst inside him from time to time but he felt like it had become harder to control them.


	2. A look for the sky

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY!  
> it's been a while! well i've warned that the delay might be big but I still feel very sorry!  
> Quarantine kinda helped because the world situation was way too similar to this fic and I kinda wrote it (in french haha) during that time but I still had a thesis to write because education doesn't care about a pandemic, anyway. (funfact: this fic has the same amount of words as my actual thesis)  
> This chapter is,, a lot of context so I hope you won't be too bored by it  
> also i hope my conjugation is okay because it's late and my head hurts:)  
> enjoy!

Ever since Minhyuk had left childhood, snow had fully disappeared. He vaguely remembered how it looked like and how he used to see it covering the lawns of the park he would cross with his mom every day to go to his primary school. However, every December, when the month was ending, he desperately tried to remember how snow had felt between his fingers, how happy he had been building snowmen with his friends or with his parents, how magical it was to see snowflakes falling down the sky during Christmas. And every time, Minhyuk painfully realized how dim the memories were.

Earth was better. At least, it had reached a form of stability enough to host humanity and Minhyuk felt joy every day just by seeing how their efforts and sacrifices were eventually paying back. However, he was lucid enough to know that there were things that would probably never come back. _Like snow and winter_ , he thought, staring at the grayish landscape visible through his office’s window. It was his mother’s favourite season.

“Minhyuk, do you know how this thing works?”

He turned over. On the office next to his own, Kihyun sadly looked at the screen of his computer. The government's fight against over-consumption and over-consumerism had lead to a gigantic step backward that most people still had to adjust to. It was allowed per house one computer and one fixed line phone. Smartphones were only for extreme emergency, for workers who needed it the most, but they were considerably outdated. Kihyun was a bit older than Minhyuk and he often ended up lost in front of the old computers that had been put in every government services. Minhyuk got up of his chair to look at what was going on.

“It’s lagging,” said Kihyun with a sigh, “like usual.”

“I’m sure you clicked several time on the same thing, trying to make things go faster. Let me do it.”

His coworker glared at him but still let Minhyuk in front of the screen. Like he had predicted it, the computer had overheated due to the various commands Kihyun had made in a rush. “Wait and see. If it doesn’t work, than shut it down,” he concluded with a shrug.

“But I’ll lost everything that I was doing!” Kihyun whined.

“It’s a lesson for you, you never save your work!”

He laughed at the disappointed look on the other one’s face. They had been working together only for a year but they had already got to the point of their relation where Minhyuk would feel comfortable. Kihyun was the outspokenness kind of guy, he never failed to comment, even when nobody had asked for his opinion. He could, in the same day, let out the bitterest remark and then show the kindest friendship act. He would never take offense in Minhyuk’s teasing words, knowing exactly how to answer to it. The youngest had started to work in the office right after finishing high school, his results had been satisfying enough for him to be hire in one of the various State offices Their job was to check applications processing, to validate or not inquires for food rationing. Kihyun had immediately taken care of him, making him feel as comfortable as possible in the new environment, correcting his mistakes without protesting. Minhyuk had never liked or disliked his job, what had always been in his mind was to simply be useful in the big gear that allowed them to survive, but Kihyun had made everything so much more pleasant.

“It doesn’t matter anyway. I could do nothing more for this file.”

Minhyuk was taken aback, “an application form for more food rations,” Kihyun explained, “she has a young child with her and her mother who is too old to work. She has to skip meal so they can.”

Kihyun was staring at his computer screen. He had tried to keep the most placid tone possible, but Minhyuk could hear a bit of sadness in it. Their job was making them being as objective as possible, to follow the law. Sometimes the cases were easy, especially when they accepted files. Often, it was not. However, his colleague rarely showed his personal opinions nor his feelings about the cases he was working on.

“She’s supposed to come back this afternoon,” he said, turning furiously off his computer, “I think she’s missing work for that.”

He loudly sighed and turned on the computer.

“Do you want me to come with you?”

Minhyuk could feel Kihyun’s despair and it was unsettling. Usually, Kihyun was the one that was handling everything for him. The one leading him, helping him, teaching him. Minhyuk had the feeling that the tables had turned. And Kihyun would have done the same thing for him.

“Yes, please,” Kihyun answered in a very low voice.

He nodded and smiled slightly. His gaze fell on the files he had yet to examine. He felt nauseous. Him and Kihyun were only tiny links in a way bigger chains of decisions that were beyond their control; Minhyuk had always been able to get back home after work peacefully, thinking that even if his decisions of the day might have been terrible for someone else, it was not really his fault. The task was easier without any contact with the people he had to “regulate”. It was only another file that he was putting on the declined pile, a click on the computer to delete their demand, a story that he putting a final point on. He bit his lip, feeling anxious. He had never met anyone behind those files, he had always let that job for the front desks, choosing to stay into the office where he simply grab the demands afterwards. It was also what Kihyun did.

“Why did you had to met her?” he asked, unsure.

He did not turn to see his friend, but he heard him sigh once again, “I should not have,” he confessed, “I thought that seeing her might get us to find a solution. It was stupid.”

Minhyuk did not answer. It was not asked for them to do this, on the opposite. The system was done in a way that dehumanization would make the process faster, so everyone would get what they deserved and everyone would be able to survive. Trying to foil the rules of the system would lead to excesses that would harm the greater good. Kihyun should not have. But Minhyuk could not blame him.

The young man stayed on the side when Kihyun met the woman. Arms crossed on his chest, not being able to say anything, he watched his friend explain the situation. He stared at the woman’s face slowly losing the remaining colors as his colleague spoke. The bags under her eyes were already deep but the news brought even more fatigue on her expression. Her shoulders fell down, her hands shook and Minhyuk even thought she was about to collapse. Though, he did not move at all, frozen by the entire situation. She yelled and begged but Kihyun did not change his position. His lips had disappeared into a thin line on his face, he stayed still yet Minhyuk could see his knees shaking too.

“I’m so sorry,” Kihyun muttered, “I really tried everything.”

And the image of this woman’s eyes filled with tears stayed in Minhyuk’s memory. The pain of this woman that he had never seen before, was printed in his mind.

*

Jooheon always looked at the sky. Simple gesture that had became as natural as breathing for him, bringing him some kind of serenity that he could not feel any other way. He felt like a century had gone by ever since his life had completely changed, yet the memories where coming back regularly in his mind. Waves of nostalgia, but also rushes of rage and injustice that he could only hold back by looking at the sky above him. To stare for a second at the birds in the vast blue expanse, silent promise of a coming freedom. Or, at least, it was what he liked to think of.

Jooheon had never been able to travel, even before trains and planes trips started to be regulated by the State, only allowing important ones. Fortunately for him, most of the kids in his neigborhood at that time had the same lives and they would spend their summers together. They would hide into abandoned social housings, tall and impersonal buildings with far more tenants than place, playing with the limits that were put on them; their parents, school, the police. The young man could still taste the powerful feeling that their forbidden getaways would bring, laughing as they would stole candies and other candies in supermarkets, smoking their first cigarettes, that they had took from their big brothers, running then in the streets to avoid them. Summer days were always the same, Jooheon had kept the naive hope that one day, maybe later in his life, he would be able to earn enough money to go on holidays. However, later never happened. Confined in the city, were living spaces where constantly becoming smaller to welcome green areas in which they were forbidden to go, where every minute spent outside was controlled, where everyone had extremely self disciplined, Jooheon had never felt more stuck.

His usual look for the sky always made him remember that the world was bigger than what their government was trying to make them believe. Jooheon refused to believe that humanity could not live without destroying itself. He needed to believe into another solution, into another way to live, a middle way that would bring back the freedom he was missing so much. Jooheon’s faith had never been shaken up; not by the educational system he had went through, nor other’s opinion. It was for him the only way to stay alive.

His hands on his pockets, he walked faster. The young man had stopped for a while to walk slowly, peacefully so he could watch the landscape around him. Every moment outside was getting him from a point A to a point B, without going backwards, without getting lost in the city for the pleasure of walking. There was not much to do in the city to roam anyway. Only a few bars and restaurants that had been allowed to stay open, showing the one and only television channel, but it was meant for an elite that was able to pay for it. For Jooheon, each step outside was giving him chills going all the way from the bottom to the top of his spine, he felt like an outlaw in the middle of the city that had birthed him.

The road was short, not even ten minutes. He knew it by heart now, he was doing it every day, unless he had to work. Ten little minutes outside and then, right before he entering one of the abandoned social housing, a look for the sky. Their government had followed a very precise plan to destroy any non-necessary housing to turn all this place into “ecological” area. To limit the pollution that destroying was bringing, they only did a few per year. Jooheon knew very well that one day, the year that would destroy the building in which he had created his refuge would come. But the thought did not worry him, no matter what, he would build it somewhere else

Like the other buildings of the suburb, now mostly deserted by its old residents, nature was growing back. The weed had reached the level of the first floors’ windows, ivy was covering the facades, growing every day a bit more, seeping in the empty apartments. Little flowers were growing into the wild green, coloring with spots of yellow, blue and purple. Every time Jooheon was walking the tiny stairs to get into the front door, forever open, he felt a bittersweet taste in his mouth. He was paying everyday the price for this landscape to be able to bloom in this ancient sea of concrete.

Jooheon did not mind the cracks into the paint on the wall of the building, nor the broken tiles on the floor, nor the unpleasant smell, and rushed to the door behind the elevators that were leading to the basement. He had never knew why in this building the electricity had never been cut off but he was largely enjoying it, transforming the huge place in the basement into a stage. Nothing too luxurious, of course, but big enough to be able to act plays already known or that they had written. A place to create and to play but, and mostly, a place to express and share that illegality had made even more exciting.

It was not a theater, there were no shows there, there were no precise purpose; there only were a few persons that had gathered into this place, following Jooheon’s lead. Persons like him, that did not enjoy the world they were living in, persons that wanted to transmit, to share something. Sometimes it was very accurate, sometimes less. It was words, expressions, emotions, confused whirls of feelings. It was deeply human in a society that was reducing them to their utility, as they were machines.

“Jooheon?” said a voice when he had reached the bottom of the stairs.

Before he could answer anything, Changkyun had hugged him, “I’m glad to see you,” he whispered when Jooheon hugged him back.

Changkyun had not came for a few weeks. He had no way to contact him, beside the refuge, and, for safety reasons, they did not know each other addresses.

“Me too,” he answered.

It would have been lying to say he had not been worried about Changkyun. From time to time, horrible scenarios had crossed him mind, in which the young man was arrested but he was not surprised to see him safe in the middle of the basement, showing the same big smile on his face. He had never met someone more resourceful than him, except maybe himself. Changkyun had arrived in the city when he was fifteen, forced by the water level raising to leave the coast where he had always lived with his mother. At that moment, Jooheon had turned eighteen years old and, freshly out of high school, had had decided to help the new ecological refugees. He had, for a while, host Changkyun in his tiny studio, just the time needed for his mother to get back on her feet, find a job and find a more or less normal life. As long as they were the same nationality, the government had done everything to help and put everyone in the system.

“Cops had been doubled in my neighborhood,” sighed Changkyun as Jooheon put his stuffs on a char, “it was impossible to go out, unless to go to work. I could not take any risk.”

“You did well, I’m glad you’re okay.”

Changkyun grabbed Jooheon’s backpack and threw him an interrogative look, “I found three new plays,” the latter explained.

The youngest held back a scream of joy and immediately opened the bag. When Jooheon had met Changkyun, he had never done any theater in his life, and the age gap between them had resulted in him never studying it into the newly school system, at that time already reformed. But Changkyun was curious, unable to stay put and when he had found books he had never seen before into Jooheon’s desk drawers, he had asked tons of questions. Jooheon had decided to tell him everything.

“Have you been here for a while?” he asked.

“No,” said Changkyun, already going through the books, “the others are coming?”

“I hope so, I thought we could chose which one we want to work on.”

Changkyun nodded with enthusiasm, going back to his discovery. In the corner of the room, a tiny shelf, that Hoseok, another actor of their made-up troupe, had built. It was already covered with books. A sight that always reassured Jooheon, even more now that the city libraries were being shut down and that nobody knew what they were doing with the books in those. Every member was trying to find and bring plays but also, novels that they would try to stage but the task was becoming more and more complicated and dangerous. The government had made clear that owning pieces of art or of entertainment was forbidden. Paper was recycled for more useful things and money that was put into its writing, publication, or translation, was used for something else. It was not necessary anymore. Jooheon also knew that those at the head of the country were trying to erase the memories of the life before, to condemn imagination and mental escaped, so that they would be pleased with how things were now.

They heard footsteps in the stairs and whispers. Changkyun got up, Jooheon next to him, and they rushed to welcome Hoseok and Hyungwon.

*

Kihyun took his day off right after he had closed the file. Minhyuk did not believe his ears when someone explained to him that he was not coming back until the next Monday. Their days off were so rare and Kihyun usually only used his at the same time as his husband, Hyunwoo, holidays. It was a bit worried that Minhyuk rang at their apartment on the Saturday afternoon, nervously playing with his fingers, not knowing really if his presence was needed. Hyunwoo opened the door, surprised, but he let him in.

“I don’t know if he would want to see someone,” Hyunwoo said after Minhyuk had explained to him why he had come.

Hyunwoo was a teacher in elementary school. Minhyuk had been very impressed with his first meeting with him, not expecting to see such a tall and impressive man. He was twice Kihyun’s size and obviously liked working out. If he had crossed his path on the road, not knowing him, he might have been a bit scared, but Hyunwoo was more calm and gentle than Kihyun. He always spoke softly, and his eyes would turn into two moon crescents when he laughed.

“Is he okay?” asked Minhyuk, grabbing the glass of water his host was giving to him.

Hyunwoo scratched his head, thinking, “It’s complicated. It hit him a lot.”

“Why?”

Hyunwoo hesitated, “he hadn’t explain anything to you?”

Minhyuk shook his head. Hyunwoo bit his lower lip. The youngest did not dare to insist but curiosity was killing him.

“Because of the child,” said a voice behind them.

They both turned to see Kihyun on the frame of the door. He looked tired and was still wearing his pajamas; Minhyuk still felt deeply relieved to see him. Hyunwoo gave his husband a bit of space on the couch. Kihyun smiled lightly to Minhyuk who was patiently waiting for more explanations.

“I should have not accepted this file,” he sighed, “but when I saw that it was about a child, I just could not resist… I wanted to do something. I could not let them like that.”

He grabbed Hyunwoo’s hand who squeezed it gently.

“We wanted a child,” Hyunwoo said, “but there is no solution for us. With birth control, it is almost impossible to adopt.”

Minhyuk was surprised at how calm his voice sounded. Kihyun was trying not to raise his head, his feet were nervously hitting the floor, “I could not let a child suffer even if it is not mine,” he eventually added.

His voice broke at the end of the sentence and Hyunwoo put a comforting hand on his back. Minhyuk stayed silent, his heart sinking in his chest. Even Hyunwoo’s face, who usually was very composed, had darkened.

“I’m sorry,” was all he managed to say.

The words seemed useless, seeing how obvious the two men were suffering. Hyunwoo still smiled at him, which made Minhyuk even sadder. He wished he could have said he would find a solution, even indirectly by helping this woman, but the three of them knew it would have been only fake hopes. Fists and throat tight, he watched without saying anything else his two friends’ pain. A strange feeling grew inside of him, pressing his chest and blocking his breathing. An unpleasant itching wandered in his spine, he felt useless. His helplessness made a rush of anger roar in his stomach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i also hate myself for what i'm doing to showki don't worry it's a mutual feeling and it's VALID, i'll write a fic where they have children and are happy because we all need that content tbh  
> joohyuk is REALLY happening in the next chapter (i have no idea if it's already written in french entirely? but a lot is already written) 
> 
> see you soon thank you for reading <3


	3. An inch of help

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!!! I'm so excited to share this chapter!!:D  
> I don't have much to say, just a reminder that i switched Joohyuk's ages soo do not get confused with the oldest and youngest- and i hope it's not too annoying. 
> 
> Thank you everyone who commented on the last chapter it made me very happy and it was a pleasure to discuss with you :) I'll try harder for my next updates! Hope you enjoy this <3

Minhyuk’s eyes were heavy and he was about to fall asleep when he heard screams and whistles in the street. He got up, half-surprised half-panicked. He was living in a calm neighborhood, near the administrative buildings in which he was working in. It was an accommodation that has been given to him as soon as he had gotten his job. After curfew, the streets would go quiet, every living soul had gone back home a while ago, no one would take the risk to break the law. Curious, the young man got near the window, slightly pulling the curtain to understand what was going on outside. The street lights had already been turned off, to consume less electricity, and it was almost impossible to see anything. He opened a bit the window, using his hearing as much as possible. He heard footsteps. They seemed to be still far away but were walking closer quickly. Someone was running. Minhyuk’s apartment was just on the corner of the street, on the first floor.

Some voices yelled, “stop right here!”

Even in the dark, he understood that the person running had stopped right beside his front door. The stranger’s breathing was loud, obviously out of breath like he had been running for a while now. Minhyuk bit his lower lip. It was probably someone who had not been careful enough of the curfew and was now chased by the police. He could discern more clearly now the police shouting but the runaway was not moving. He was glued against the wall like he had hoped to disappear in it, his breathing was still not coming back to normal. Minhyuk hesitated. Eventually, he closed the window and opened his front door.

“Come here,” he whispered.

The runaway turned around, “quickly,” added Minhyuk.

His heart was beating fast, he already was regretting the decision he had made but he could not bear the idea of witnessing an arrest for something as insignificant as breaking the curfew. After what seemed to be like an eternity, the runaway followed him inside of his apartment and Minhyuk closed the door right when the police turned on the street. As discreetly as possible, he turned the key in the keyhole and then made a sign to the other one to be quiet.

“He was just there,” said a voice behind the door.

“Are you sure he turned in this street?”

“Of course!”

At the light of his apartment, Minhyuk could see that the runaway was a young man, maybe a bit older than he was. He had immediately leaned against the wall, not daring to move at all, his eyes analyzing the room he was into while his breathing was slowly calming down. They stayed a few minutes like that, none of them making any noise, as aware as possible to make sure that the police were giving up on their job.

The stranger raised his eyes, “thank you,” he said when the street was silent again.

Minhyuk nodded. If it had been obvious for him to help, he was now feeling embarrassed, “I could not let you be arrested just because of the curfew,” he explained, “it had been changed recently. It can happen.”

The young man avoided his look, Minhyuk noticed the bag he was carrying and the black hoodie and jeans he was wearing. He was becoming more and more doubtful.

“It was just the curfew, right?” he asked in a low voice.

They stayed a second quiet, the stranger was holding the straps of his backpack as it could fall off his shoulders. Minhyuk was still against the door, as far as possible from the other one, his arms crossed on his chest. He tried to keep a neutral face, a serious look on it, to hide the awkwardness growing inside of him.

“Kinda,” the runaway answered.

“What do you mean?”

The stranger eventually raised his eyes. They exchanged a look and Minhyuk thought it would have been better not to ask. “You’re not going to hurt me?” he said instead.

The young man seemed offended by the question, “of course not!”

Minhyuk could hear the sincerity in his voice as much as he could see it in his gestures. He had let go of his back and had nodded vigorously. Minhyuk felt his body relax a bit, although he was still on the lookout.

“What were you doing then?”

He hesitated. The tip of his tongue passed on his lips, his hands going back to the straps. “Maybe I shouldn’t know...” started Minhyuk, shaking his head.

The last thing he wanted was to be a part of something illegal, he was already understanding that opening his door to someone chased by the police could already bring him trouble if he had been seen. And now, he was stuck in his own apartment with a potential criminal because he had dumbly followed a pulse in his brain. He sighed. The stranger was still staring at him, as embarrassed by the situation as he was, he was still leaning on the wall. He did not seem very dangerous.

“My name is Minhyuk,” he said, taking a step toward him.

“Jooheon.”

They did not shake hands, simply nodding their head as a sign that they both had registered the information.

Jooheon spoke again, “I wasn’t doing anything bad. Just grabbed some books.”

Minhyuk had not expected this at all. His gaze went from Jooheon’s face to the backpack he was still holding, understanding why it seemed to be so precious to him.

“Books?”

“Plays mostly, sometimes other stuff, everything I can save.”

“The government forbid to own books.”

The other did not answer. He was holding up Minhyuk’s look, not to defy him, more like he was trying to share something that words could not explain. Oddly enough, he managed to understand. If no one was taking those books, they would probably be destroyed. “I only have one bed,” Minhyuk said, “but I have a couch.”

Jooheon was not dangerous, he was just trying to save the last books and this made Minhyuk’s last doubts disappear. The idea that someone was breaking the laws for books was warming up his heart. He made a sign of the hand to the rest of the room, inviting the other man to step in it.

“Thank you,” said Jooheon.

“My mom loved books too,” was all Minhyuk could answer.

They exchanged another look, this time even more meaningful than everything they could have pronounced. Jooheon smiled, little dimples appearing on his cheeks, and Minhyuk thought he had been right to follow his instinct.

*

Jooheon left Minhyuk’s place very early. They had not talked more, letting a slightly odd but not embarrassing silence fall between them for the rest of the night. The actor had immediately lied down on the couch, doing his best to not invade the already nice enough stranger’s intimacy. It had been harder to not throw little looks to the young man, but he had still managed to not detailed his face and actions, focusing on the walls of the apartment. Minhyuk had seemed a bit distressed by the fact that he was there, but not really bothered. He had not been able to sleep. Now that he had left he regretted he had not talked more with him.

They only had exchanged a quick goodbye before going back to their own path. Jooheon had not asked for him to keep his secret, thinking that the fact that he had kept him safe during the night was enough to show that Minhyuk was trustful. The last sentence he had told him was still ringing in his ears. A sign that Jooheon took as positive; no matter who was that Minhyuk, he would not betray him.

Once outside, the actor had hesitated. He could have gone back to his place, take a shower, change his clothes, and go back to sleep after this restless night but he followed his heart to the refuge. It was one of the first times that he was walking without caring about what was around him. Lost in his mind, his thoughts had stayed in the tiny apartment he had just left. The curiosity that had kept him up all night was still a turmoil inside of him, a storm of questions raging in his mind.

Without any surprise, Jooheon found the refuge empty. They were not supposed to meet more than three times a week, avoiding as much as possible their meetings so they would not look too suspicious. Maybe, like he was doing, the others would sometimes come here without any particular reason, but he had never run into them. He took out the books, that he had found the night before, and put them into the shelves. They were starting to overflow. Jooheon smiled, feeling better at the heap of words. The evening before, he had seen himself too close to being condemned and jailed. Minhyuk was the one that had saved him from that.

“Someone’s here?” asked Changkyun’s voice from the bottom of the stairs, startling Jooheon. He had not heard the young man entering. He put back a book that was about to fall before rejoining the other.

Changkyun seemed a bit sheepish, “I thought no one would be there,” he confessed.

“Is something wrong?”

The youngest sighed, he knew he could not hide anything to Jooheon who knew him way too much to be able to understand each of his micro-expressions. “I had nowhere to go, but I could not stay at home.”

Jooheon guided him to the couch, encouraging him to talk with a sign of the head. “My mother doesn’t want me to go back to school. She says I have to find a job and be useful.”

His jaw tensed like it had been hard to simply say those words. The actor looked at him with a compassionate look. It had always been difficult for Changkyun to have a good relationship with his mother; their exodus had completely destroyed their balance and, as time had passed by, she had melted with the rest of the society at the extreme opposite of her son. However, she used to keep silent when it comes to his decision. A mutual agreement between them, each of them would leave their life like they want to, they just would not talk about it.

“I tried to explain to her,” he continued sadly, “but it’s hopeless. She keeps on saying the State saved us and we have to give it back.”

Changkyun stayed silent a second.

“She told me we should be grateful they gave us the right to be alive.”

Jooheon felt a shiver going down his spine. A look with his friend made him understand they were sharing the same hostile sensation to this way of thinking. Having the right to live. Deserving to be alive. As many inhuman concepts that had still managed to grow in the minds of the majority. Changkyun’s mom was just one person among a multitude to share those ideas. And each individual that was believing in those was a reason for Jooheon to keep on playing. To hide in this bubble where those people's words would not exist anymore, where he could dream, think, imagine, fail and endlessly try again, experimenting with a semblance of freedom. To have the freedom of speech but mostly of being able to live his life the way he wanted to, and with people that would understand him.  
“You can’t live with her anymore,” Jooheon eventually said.

“I know but what can I do?” Changkyun pouted, “they’d never give an apartment to someone like me.”

Jooheon got up, “we’re gonna try!” He avoided the skeptical look from the youngest, he had enough motivation for both of them. If he could not free Changkyun from the way the world was working now, he could at least ease the burden on his shoulders. Despite his obvious lack of conviction, Changkyun followed him, leaving the basement and getting back to the city’s center.

*

Too tired to keep his eyes open, Minhyuk was half asleep in front of his computer screen. He had not been able to rest during the night, too disturbed by the breathing of another person in his apartment, too curious about the reasons that had brought him there, but also, too scared because he had helped someone that the State would have seen as a criminal. He had lied on his back, staring at the ceiling until he could distinguish the cracks on it even in the dark. The young man had thought about waking up the other, making him leave his house, and going back to sleep without feeling like an outlaw himself. A simple gesture that would mean putting the other into the hands of the police and Minhyuk knew he could have not been able to sleep better after doing that.

He had not asked himself many questions for a while. Kihyun had come back to work, not showing any of his personal issues that he was carrying and Minhyuk had avoided any comment, acting like nothing had happened, while keeping an eye on him. While showing him as discreetly and indirectly as possible that he was there for him no matter what. The young employee still felt helpless and what had happened the night before was not helping at all. He eyed his files, pouting, Minhyuk had never questioned the justice he was working for.

He made a sign to Kihyun to make him know he was getting a break, even though he had not worked at all during the morning. He was replaying in his head his meeting with Jooheon, remembering too precisely every look they had exchanged and every word of their short discussion. Minhyuk wished he had asked him more questions, to know what kind of book were in his bag, how he had got it back, and why. His mother had always had an impressive collection of novels, plays, essays, and other literature or philosophical books that she was keeping with pride and Minhyuk had never been able to read everything before they were taken away. His fingers were still tingling at the thought of having been so close to what his mother had dedicated her entire life and yet to have let it go so easily.

Instead of going into the resting room for employees, he walked until the entrance of the building. There was nothing to observe or admire inside it, a few posters displaying some information, but no decoration. He thought about the old city hall he had once or twice went with his parents before, about the giant chandeliers hanging from the ceiling, the pretty furniture, and the well-made architecture. The historical buildings of the city had been kept, but most of their spaces had been sealed off to reduce electricity consumption but also to have less to furnish and to maintain.

Like everywhere else, every piece of art had been recycled into raw material that the country needed to function without the polluting techniques. Minhyuk had been lucky enough to find a job into an ancient building, he could have not imagine working into one of the gray and cold inside they were now putting up. Here, they had concluded that destroying the tall ceilings and the engraved walls would have been more polluting than keeping it. However, every day the gilt was losing its shine, dust was piling up on the higher parts of the windows and the broken furniture was replaced with basic construction.

The administration had been correctly redone by the government. Everything needed to be quick and correct. Each person that was entering an administrative building knew exactly what file they had to fill up, each person that was given the job to give and take those files could answer every question. It was so rare to grant help that reviewing every demand was mechanic and thus efficient. If something was missing inside of the file, it was simply put away. No one could allow forgetting a document, not when it was about eating enough per day or having a roof above one’s head. The government had every power and was handling the city with an iron fist.

“I’m sorry,” an employee said startling Minhyuk, “without an appointment I can not help you.”

“When can we have an appointment?”

“It is not an emergency so you will have to wait, maybe for a month.”

Minhyuk got out of his thoughts, the voice sounding familiar in his ears. He turned around, curious. He stayed shocked for a second, recognizing the face that had not let him take a break. It was the same Jooheon as the night before that was standing in front of that employee, who had a sincerely sorry face and was probably simply following the rules. But it was a Jooheon with an angry expression and a dark look that Minhyuk had not believed he could see on a face that had to inspire trust for him. Next to him, another young man. Like the first one, his eyes seemed to be throwing daggers.

“What is going on?”

He had not realized he had gotten closer to them and that the words had crossed his lips. The three men turned to him, obviously surprised by his question. He saw on Jooheon’s face that he had recognized him too, a vague confusion showing into his intimidating look. Minhyuk showed his ID badge to the other employee who nodded, understanding who he was.

“This young man,” he explained, pointing on the man with Jooheon, “wants to fill up an accommodation demand.”

“Are you homeless?” asked Minhyuk.

Jooheon answered for him, “Changkyun lives with his mother, but he needs to move.”

The said Changkyun nodded. The employee, whose badge was showing the name Jeon Wonwoo, hardly hid the tired sigh. “He has no valid reason, no work, nothing urgent. He is not a priority.”

Changkyun lowered his gaze but the anger in Jooheon’s eyes got stronger. “I can maybe try to give him an appointment but it is almost impossible that...”

“I’m gonna take care of it,” said Minhyuk.

He was staring into Jooheon’s eyes, not intimidated by the hostile vibe that was coming out of it. On the contrary, he felt suddenly ready to do everything to calm the burning fire into his pupils.

“It’s against the orders,” started Wonwoo but giving up quickly when Minhyuk took the paper that Changkyun had probably filled when he had entered.

“Nobody needs to know,” he answered a bit harshly.

Minhyuk could feel Wonwoo’s disapproving look following him when he took Jooheon and Changkyun in the corridors, but he did not care. In the middle of the rage in Jooheon and Changkyun’s pupils, he had been able to distinguish a dash of despair, the same kind that he had seen on Kihyun and Hyunwoo’s faces and he did not want to ignore it anymore.

*

Jooheon took a sit on the chair Minhyuk was pointing at with his head, while Changkyun was sitting next to him. He could feel the confusion coming from his friend’s mind and he could easily guess the number of questions that probably were bursting in his brain. But he had only answered with shrugs to his puzzled looks. He himself was not sure about what was going on. Minhyuk seemed to have decided to help them, even if it was not the procedure. He looked at the latter who was talking with his colleague.

“Are we in trouble?” whispered Changkyun. Jooheon observed the determined expression on Minhyuk’s face and the frown on his colleague's who was listening to him.

“I don’t think so.”

The actor was not sure about the exact motivations of the other but he could feel they were far from danger. Like the night before, Minhyuk had decided to help but his motives were still mysterious. Changkyun surely wanted to say something else but the two employees came back in front of them.

“Good morning, my name is Yoo Kihyun,” said the smallest.

They shook hands, politely. Minhyuk grabbed a sit in front of Jooheon, Kihyun stayed up beside him.

“We can try to do something,” Minhyuk explained, “Changkyun needs to have a job.”

Even if he was not talking about him, Minhyuk was keeping his gaze into Jooheon’s. Changkyun got up a bit, his feet nervously tapping the floor. Minhyuk was talking low, even if the room was empty beside them. There were several other offices around the one they were on, obviously one was Kihyun’s but the others were empty, only the computers and a few personal objects showed that they were someone’s.

“We can’t promise anything,” added Kihyun firmly, “but the offices here are always looking for people and I can make a reference.”

The announcement unsettled Jooheon who lost contact with Minhyuk. “A job here would give an official accommodation,” the latter said.

“You could really do that?” asked Changkyun, “even if I’m not qualified?”

He was staring at the two employees with disbelief, Jooheon was also finding hard to believe what was happening. Kihyun smiled, “we can take care of this,” he softly said.

Jooheon kept for himself a thousand questions that burst in his mind, not wanting to push their luck too far. “Is it safe for you to do that?” he just wondered.

Minhyuk and Kihyun exchanged a look, then Minhyuk shrugged. None of them answered the question.

“Thank you,” muttered Changkyun.

“We will do as much as possible,” answered Kihyun.

Changkyun had stopped the nervous tapping and Jooheon heard him take a deep breath of relief. He also felt a rush of gratitude for Minhyuk.

Minhyuk looked at Changkyun, “how can I contact you?”

Jooheon stared at his friend. They could not write his address, his mother would risk finding the papers and, in the better case, would ask questions, in the worst one, would prevent him from leaving.

“My address,” let out Jooheon, “the information can come through me, I’d tell Changkyun.”

Minhyuk raised an inquiring eyebrow toward the involved one who nodded and Kihyun gave a pen and a paper to Jooheon, who wrote down his address. Minhyuk read the note and put it near his computer keyboard.

Kihyun smiled, “very good, we’ll see all this in the week.”

The two actors got up, shaking once again Kihyun and Minhyuk’s hands as a goodbye. Minhyuk led them to the exit, “see you soon,” he said staring at Jooheon who smiled at him a bit shyly.

“Thank you for your help.”

Minhyuk nodded, giving back a smile. They left the office. He and Changkyun walked for a bit in silence, both of them thinking about what had happened. Even if it was Jooheon who had made Changkyun came here, he had not thought that they would get what he wanted, Minhyuk and Kihyun’s help was a blessing.

“Why did they help me like that?”

Changkyun’s face was always unreadable but his voice was showing an obvious relief and Jooheon wanted to believe the two employees would keep their word.

“I don’t really know,” the eldest confessed trying to find their way back in the corridors, “but Minhyuk already helped me yesterday night….”

“What?”

Jooheon put his hands in his pockets. He could not help but smile. All the tiredness from the restless night was gone. He got closer to his friend, to be able to whisper to him, knowing very well they were not in a safe place, “I almost got caught after the curfew, Minhyuk let me enter in his apartment when I was being chased by the police.”

Changkyun held back a scream of surprise.

“I have no idea why he is still helping us, I didn’t even know he was working there. We didn’t talk much.”

They had eventually reached the outside of the building. “It looks like destiny,” commented Changkyun, thoughtful.

Jooheon laughed and shook his head. He did not answer but he liked the idea.

“I hope it’s going to work,” said the youngest more for himself than anything else, “I can’t live there anymore.”

Once again, the other silently agreed, putting a comforting arm around his shoulders, “you can always stay at my place,” he reminded him.

Changkyun nodded with enthusiasm, his eyes sparkling with hope and gratitude. Jooheon had a last look for the building, wondering what was pushing Minhyuk to help them. If his friend was right and that it was destiny, there was a big chance that everything will go well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> find me on twitter if you wanna discuss more! @woobrioche

**Author's Note:**

> Im kinda very insecure but proud about this work so yeah hope you will like it, if you did so please I'd adore some kudos and comments thank you so much for reading this prologue and I hope everything makes sense!


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